When a codependent finally starts speaking up about their own needs narcissistic people may call them NEEDY. They ignore how much the codependent/empath has done because they have taken it all for-granted. It never occurs to the narcissistic person because they are consumed with their own needs and wants.
A codependent will eventually have their cup so empty they do start speaking up about their own needs and wants. This annoys narcissistic people.
When a codependent/empath isn’t around for the narcissistic person (because they are now taking care of their own needs) it causes a narcissistic injury for a narcissist. They take notice and wonder why the codependent isn’t working properly for them anymore . The narcissist never realizes they expected to much from them in the first place.
A codependent can’t hold their camp together and everyone else’s forever. They run out of steam. A narcissist will then start to complain and the codependent will find themselves over- explaining themselves and hurt.
Once a codependent heals and begins doing things for themselves the relationship starts to unravel and can’t survive . The person that held the ship down(codependent /empath) is now guiding there own.
A narcissist may try to Hoover the codependent back in and this may work for awhile but eventually the relationship ends because the codependent/empath ran out of gas. The narcissist can’t understand because they lack empathy.
A narcissistic relationship will wear you out. You don’t have to be on repeat practically begging for you needs to be met. A narcissist won’t validate you unless you are performing the way they want you to. They will complain and replace you if you start doing your things. You are an appliance to narcissistic people. If the toaster breaks the narcissist throws it out and gets a new one.
It’s ok to do what you need to do for yourself. No need to feel guilty or shame about that.
*Everyone has narcissistic traits. Some are on the lower end of the scale, healthy people are in the middle and narcissistic people are higher up the scale.
Narc Shield @YouTube
Have you questioned being in a narcissistic relationship pattern with different people in your life? Do you do everything for everyone but feel your life overwhelmed?